I don’t care about you, I got drafted by O’Cal!!
That’s right, the first of the bunch is here!
Seems like just two weeks ago we wrapped up the Winter 09 season, and yet here we are, gearing up for the Spring 09 entry into C.A.C. lore!
We held the draft a little early this season, because the league was already full and as a result, I could actually bang out the preview a bit early. For those in other leagues, stay tuned for your schedule and previews this week! Head to the message boards to vote for who YOU think should be #1 in the preseason rankings!
A1 Pre-Season Preview – Spring 09
So the plan was to bang this out while on Friday night, enjoying the gentle sea breeze off of Nauset Beach, while hearing the birds and the crickets chirp in the early morning hours, as the sun crest over the horizon and I sat, inspired by the beauty around me, and as the alcohol raged in my system.
Fortunately for the sake of coherency, I succumbed to peer pressure from the Shepard and didn’t make it past 3 in the morning, my thigh-top still tucked neatly into my weekend bag.
So now, as I sit here in the early on Saturday afternoon, enjoying the gentle sea breeze off of Nauset Beach, while hearing the birds and the crickets chirp, as the sun sits behind a cloud front off the ocean, I am inspired still, as the hangover rages in my skull…
Yea that intro was too long and may need to be edited (Ed. Note: it wasn’t), here’s the recap of draft day, this past Thursday and my pre-season preview for all you A1 glory hogging ballers out there.
o We’ve got a 9 AM start time for this thing, and despite constant delays, seemingly hours between picks, and moaning by every captain, we were done by 4 PM. That’s the quickest we’ve ever done it, and every season we’re getting quicker. By the Winter ’12 season, we might be done the draft on noon.
o Harvey drops the first bomb on all of us and drafts the Hitman, completely unexpected! I have a feeling that this is going to be a hell of a day. The best news is that means the Jumpman gets drafted after Jared, just like every mock draft had him going after. Yea, he’s not happy about it.
o Every man remembers key dates from his life time as he moves from a child into adult hood. Mine of course are 10/2/89, 6/24/93, 9/7/99, 11/14/01, 3/23/03, and 7/25/07. Make of those dates what you will, but you can officially add 4/30/09 to the list, as O’Cal drafts me with the 8th overall pick in the Spring 09 A1 Draft. I’m giddy, can’t stop smiling and NOTHING can ruin this day for me!
o The Jumpman up to his usual shenanigans. After going #5 to Serge, he protests loudly and wildly about the pick of BFrat in the second round. Doesn’t Serge remember that absolutely TERRIBLE B5v5 team I put in with Terry, Billy, myself, and RoY that lost its last 8 games? At the very, very last instant, Serge gets in a change of pick and selects Pete Wilson, yea, good luck with that man.
o Honestly you don’t want me to regal you with more of the rest of the draft proceedings. It’s a lot more of the same, draft picks, everyone mocking me (and O’Cal for drafting me), non-captains putting their two cents into the draft when no one asked them, and everyone mocking me. Letís get to the preseason rankings, shall we?
1 – Conquer by Breeding – Frail *C, Billy Durbrow, Billy Fratelli, Kurt Knepshield, Ryan Halliday (R), Collin Crotty
I’ve tried to talk myself out of ranking this squad top overall, especially because it was drafted by Frail, but I can’t justify putting anyone else over them. The last two seasons a first time captain has taken home the Brick, is Frail going to make it three in a row? Theyíve got the burden of expectations this season with a #1 preseason ranking and additional media scrutiny. The biggest challenge for this squad is making sure that BFrat shows up to about half the games sober. Anything more than that is just a bonus. The Big Ticket, at the top of the third round, was an absolute steal and reunites with the Playboy. Heíll appreciate that, as his best season in recent memory came when these two were paired up. That just makes things easier for the Frat Boy and the rest of this crew. Dump the ball downlow, and good things will happen! With the reigning 5th Man of the Year on his side, Frail assures himself of a solid bench, no matter how he performs in his first season with the big boys.
Best Quote from the captain, M3: “Kids grow up wanting to be firemen, Tibbs grew up wishing he was a guard.”
2- Weapon X – Dorey *C, Chris Kerr, Josh Fincke, Chris Adams, Adam Kneeland, Ryan Cutright
Dorey with a great bounce back draft after having a rough go of it last season. He sticks with guys that have been good to him (Fincke, Adams) and made a great move to make sure he got one of the ‘big 6′ that were the cornerstone of this A1 draft. Then he got the hottest commodity at the end of the fourth round by grabbing AK and sneaking Cutright from KO! All in all a solid draft with guys that play smart, play well together and will put the ball in the Raginí Bullís hands come crunch time. Heís the go-to guy, there is no dispute about that, and itís good to have that straight from the beginning of the season. Kerr will be looking for a little redemption after missing out on the playoffs last season, so expect him to come in ready to play and motivated to stomp all over the league.
Best Quote from the captain, Ragin’ Bull: “Cutright” (locking up the #50 spot for KO to draft CUBA)
3 – Air Jortan – O’Cal *C, Jason Tibbetts, Kaif Thompson, Mario Casal, Derek Fields (R), Andrew Floyd
Our first round playoff loss aside, I really like this squad. In O’Cal I Trust. Let’s hear from the man himself
“We have the best defensive team ever assembled i want to make people cry when they play us, not because we are really, really, really better looking and better hung, but because they have shrink dick and can’t score on us. I expect you to adopt Dorey’s pancake seal so I can get 5 assists a game by lobbing the ball to you for an easy bucket.”
Aye, Aye Capín.
(Next) Best Quote from the captain, O’Cal: “You better bring the wood!”
4 – Stimulus CACage – Lappy *C, Majic, Zack Toth, Vladi Nechev, Yavor Nechev, Chanel Wright (R)
Lappy with a great move to trade up and get the number 1 overall pick, all he had to do was take on an extra fifth round pick. Completely worth it to get the Majic Man, health issues or not. Toth is obviously a steal, attendance issues aside, and the Nechev Brothers are great, family issues aside. Hmm the more I think about it the less I like this team. Vladi and Yavor are going to spend most of every game simply trying to outdo each other. Toth may or may not show up, and can the #1 overall pick stay away from ‘Majic’s Corner’s’ and not f up his ankle for the entire season? We’ll find out soon enough…
Best Quote from the captain, Lappy: “Lappy: I liked you as the colon better.”
5 – Beer Muscles – Serge *C, Terry Henderson, Pete Wilson, Lee Greenberg (R), Jono Edwards, Damian Ruff (R)
Holy Sh!t, a Serge captioned team is NOT ranked last! Not only may that but a first, but they’re also in the top half of the draft. It’s all down hill from here for Terry and company. The pick of Lee Greenberg at the top of the third round was a steal, as his B2 stats donít project the impact heíll have, defensively on this squad. Frail was pissed to see him go so high, and I, gladly, blame myself. If everyone didnít now have access to my mock drafts (yes, Iím a dork) Terry never would have been able to convince Serge to nab him. And getting a good shooter in the fourth, Jono, and PG in the fifth, Ruff, a former A5v5 player were huge steals. How the hell did these guys slip so far? This is one of the best teams on paper, but then again, itís still one of Sergeís, so theyíll have to be happy being ranked fifth, no small feat before theyíve stepped onto the court.
Best Quote from the captain, Jumpman: “Brandon Dorey to the Principal’s Office please, Brandon Dorey to the Principal’s Office…”
6 – Write It Off – Macho *C, Preston Raymond, Ian Tosti, Jonah Mytro (R), Ed O’Reilly, Tom Covert
Macho pulled a Serge, and grabbed an unknown in the third round after two really solid picks. Mytro is going to be the key to this squad, as PStone and Tosti can only carry so much of the weight, especially if Macho plans on actually suiting up and playing this season. I heard that Mach was actually going to lace up a pair of sneaks this season (he must have bought new ones cuz he claims heís getting off the bench now). If Mytro is a bust, or at least not a top of the third round pick, PStone could struggle to finish with a team above .500 for the second straight season. Theyíll need TíNíTosti to keep his cool and shoot near 50% from downtown for the second straight season. Itís not likely, but it certainly isnít impossible with his slingshot release.
Best Quote from the captain, Macho Man: “Ga;eiuglach, Gekralkjg, F you man, Yakejfa, Thagkas!!”
7 – Poker Face – Mike Turin, Adam Biehler, Mike Sweeney, Dan MacGregor, Chris Parkinson, Mike Fraher
Once again, I couldn’t quite get enough captains to fill the necessary 10 spots, so the League had to draft a team. I like the make-up, but we’ll see how these guys play together and work out a starting roster. Any 4 of these guys could start the game on the floor, so there’ll be no drop off when the bench checks in. That will make them dangerous. I couldn’t rank them any higher, due to contractual obligations to fellaciate the ‘Big 6’, but I really like this squad. There is no glaring weakness but no necessary strength that you can point to and say ìthis is how they’ll beat teamsî. If they find a way to work together and all show up, theyíll be a team to reckon with all season long.
Best Quote from the League Drafter, Tibbs: “Sweens, the Brady Quinn of the A1 Spring 09 draft.”
8 – Harvey’s Wallbangers – Harvey *C, Jared Perrine, Matt Wrobel, Cheese, Mike Roache, James Smith (R)
We’re calling this squad the AARP Reps all season long. Harv decided that he was going with known commodities, but ended up with a starting average age of about 34 years old. How’s that going to translate in what’s becoming a young man’s league? The Hitman is in the best shape of his life, but will Cheese and company step their game up as well? I don’t know, one of my many running themes is to rag on Wrobel anywhere, anytime, and that’s not going to stop anytime soon this season. Will Harv have two straight seasons of missing the playoffs, is that even possible?
Best Quote from the captain, Cake&Sprinkles: “O’Cal just guaranteed his team a first round playoff loss.”
9 – Nothing But Wet – KO *C, Ed Finn, Phil Lord, Chris Hall, Tim Hinkel, Will Mancortes
I have mixed emotions about KO’s squad. On one hand, well, KO headlines it, and that should be good enough for more than a 9th place spot. Plus Fizzle is a great grab at the end of the first round and Hall a bargain at the end of the third. Oh yea, that ended up being KO’s punishment for the whole Marsh fiasco last season. From now until eternity, KO is going to get the last pick in every round, in every draft. And he better not think he can sneak Mike D back into the captain’s list. But something is missing. I can’t quite put my finger, oh wait, yes i can, will CUBA help or hurt this squad? He should have taken Cutright in the second round.
Best Quote from the captain, KO: “Come on man, just give my Ryan, he wonít come otherwise.”
10 – Swinerrific – Spinney *C, Tom Kahana, Josh Nelson, Danny Salazar, Paul Giardina, Paul Reeves (R)
Back in the day when I was a captain, you know, like two seasons ago, I always tried my hardest to stir up trade rumors, flip picks and get the most top 20 picks that I could. Well Spinney is a man after my own heart, wheeling and dealing the week leading up to the draft and ending up with picks number 9, 16, 17 and then 46 and 47. A solid opportunity to really front load his squad was firmly in his grasp. But check the roster. ìWhat was the point of that?!?î I just, I just don’t like this squad. Someone has to be ranked last, and for once it wasn’t Serge’s squad. Yea, they have Paul Giardina, who’s made the Finals his first 3 seasons in A1 but he’s not making it 4 for 4. I’m predicting some struggles for the first half, as guys are going to be battling for shots, trying to get in a rhythm all while forgetting (except Salazar) that they actually have to play some D. I donít know, it just looked like Spinney came in without a back-up plan and so will have to dig his way out of the cellar.
Best Upcoming Quote from the captain, TSpin: “Die Tibbs”