B2 East Preview


1. THE MULLETS – Saugus is no longer known at CRFC as just the birthplace of tight rolled jeans, high hair, the Wolverine and the Chise. It is now known as the home to the CRFC B2 Championship Dish, which last I heard was being proudly displayed in the main dining room at Carusoís Diplomat, right next to the 1991 SHS Northeastern Conference Champs Trophy, which has since been defaced by certain members of the í91 squad. The returning champs just have to get the #1 seed after a thrilling overtime victory in last seasonís Finals. Reigning MVP Jay Sartori saw absolutely no reason to tweak his squad in the least, so they are all back for another CRFC season. Letís see if they can repeat, which is always a difficult feat at CRFC as teams have retooled and will be gunning for them every week. Hey, maybe ìDaylight Savingsî Dan OíConnell will even show up for the playoffs this season. And can I please get an explanation on the ìUsuckî and ìEvilî nicknames?

2. SERENITY NOW – Are these guys satisfied with 2nd place last year and a free water pick? If I know Team Captain and reigning GM of the Year Adam Kneeland at all, then not a chance! Kneeland has added two newcomers to last seasonís runner-up squad to join the Biggins cousins and ALL-CRFC snub AJ Freeley. Although I have no idea who the newcomers are, I bet they fill whatever need Kneeland saw in his team to get them over the hump against the Mullets. These guys are always worth the price of admission (which is free by the way to all you fans out there) and I fully expect them to get back to the Finals. Of course, I also fully expected to be much further along in my career and home life at 33, but I digress.

3. CHA-CHING – Last seasonís early favorites got a serious wake-up call courtesy of the rest of the league. They did not run away with this league as predicted by the Wolverine after three games. Instead, the bowed out in the semifinals while leading scorer Bryce Gibson was somewhere in China lost in translation. But I think that they now know that they have to bring it every week to get to the title game and I am sure they will display the intensity and ferocity that is needed to win a CRFC title. They certainly have the talent to do so, but so did the 2002 Portland Trailblazers, 2004 Pittsburgh Steelers, and the 2005 Yankees.

4. MILLENIUM – A very successful Millenium squad is back at CRFC after a one season hiatus. The Worm Jeff York and Mr. Fantasy Stat Fred Bermont return to their home team after a stint with a cowbell, joining Kevin Huestis and the rest of the Millenium gang to try to regain their magic of two seasons ago. The league is even better now though, so letís see how they adjust to the upgrade in B2 talent. I just want to know when this company thinks it is time to change its name b/c it seems outdated. Although, I still listen to Princeís ì1999î so maybe not.

5. THE WIZARDS – Anytime you have Ian Tosti of the Town on your team, you have a chance at winning. He needs about 2, 3 inches tops to get his shot off and hits them at about a 60% clip. Throw in big man Mike Eisenstein rebounding (this guy is a beast) and a new sprinkle of reigning Wolverine Award winner Dan Finkle and reigning Most Improved Player Neal Sheorey, and you have another very solid Wizards squad. But are they big enough to compete for the title or will they prove that size doesnít matter after all? Yet another team that has won it all before, so stay tuned.

6. RIPCORD – After a disappointing season, team captain Ian Whitney has apparently adopted the ever popular philosophy ìIf itís broke, then donít fix it.î Yep, itís the exact same quad on the floor this season as they did last season. Of course, it is also the exact same squad that won the title a few seasonís back, so maybe Ian knows something I donít. With a healthy Jeff Nally, this team is a wild card that nobody will want to play come playoff time.

7. GENZYME – Is this finally the season for Genzyme? Can they finally put all that talent together and make a run at the title? I feel like a Red Sox fan circa May 2004. I really want to believe in this team and will root for them until the end to succeed. They just have too much talent to have had so many losses over the past few seasons.

8. DRAGO – I donít know much about these guys except they played in the March 3 on 3 tournament. What I do know though that I will be getting much mileage out of my vast knowledge of Rocky IV in their write-ups. My only advice to this team is Rockyís advice ìGoing one more round when you don’t think you can – that’s what makes all the difference in life.î

From Parts Unknown, Weights Unknown: ARCHEMIX ñ Like The Wild Samoans Afa and Sika of the old WWF, I have no idea who these guys are or where they came from, so I cannot fairly rank them. Here is a random thought though: The old WWF ring announcer always introduced the Wild Samoans from ‘parts unknown,’ but weren’t they from, umm, Samoa?