Dirty Dirty B2 South Regular Season Awards.-
The B2 South, “Its CAC done right…” – Anyone who has ever played in this league…So much better than the B1g East its not even funny, Kap.
That’s right sports fans, another regular season in the Dirty Dirty has come to an end and this one was a doozey. We had the influx of the Wheels of Steels, AP, the Big D…we had the Bomb Squad branch off from Celtic Cross…and we had our regulars, IHML, C4NT, and Im Nasty.
The season started off with a ton of snow, an attempted Tea Bagging of yours truly (still waiting on my dinner Matt), and Chris Brown still trying to put the pieces back together…somethings never changed (we still with you Breezy), but now we are heading into the final leg and I am hell bent on handing out some accolades.
Break out the champagne and condoms fellas (ok, I’m kidding, just the champagne), because if you cannot get laid showing chicks that you are the recipient of a men’s recreational league award, there’s not much more I can do for you. Seriously, I have given you volume after volume of praise.
All winners will receive the 2011 Tical Brand Shot Thermometer. No longer will you have to wait after you brick 5 shots to know when you’re shot is heating up. This baby will tell you when your shot is hot and you are ready to pop and lock…The good news is, the thermometer gives you a celcius and farenheight reading…the bad news is, its a thermometer and we still havent come up with a way to get a reading through your ear or mouth so you do the math…
MVP – Craig Henricksen, Abusement Park Runners Up – Robert Haas, IHML and Tristian Mouligne Rogue
As the season enfolded, it was Craig’s award to lose. Craig had the stats to back up his “umph” factor. For the majority of the season, AP was atop the league and Craig was the main reason for that success, until the last 3 weeks when the ship started taking on fat chicks or water. If I start my team with anyone in the B2 South, my first draft pick is Craig and that’s that.
Offensive Player of the Year – Robert Haas Saas, IHML [*]Runners Up – Tristian Mouligne Rogue, James JHov Henderson, and Ben Frutkin[*]
The Saas was a Cee U Next Tuesday hair away from the MVP, but there was no way Bobby’s efforts weren’t getting recognized this season. IHML struggled to get #s down the stretch of the season which really hurt them in their games, but the Saas was the spoon that kept the IHML stew stirring. Loved the fact that at time, Haas could just switch it on and take over a game. Usually dont hear about that much domination unless you are listening to a Rhianna song
Bridesmaid of the B2 South – Tristan Mouligne, Wheels of Steel
Sure, you didnt win the two big awards, but your team finished #1 and is primed to make a title run. Cuddle up to Roberts if it hurts.
Defensive Players of the Year – Glenn “Big Baby”, “Show Me”, “My Camp is broke”, “Tiger Blood” Romero, Im Nasty and Qym Miller, Bomb Squad Runners Up – Scott Dobos, Ross Goldberg
This was the toughest award to give out because both players were deserving and if I gave the award to either one, there was a definate snub. Qym consistently guarded the best player on each team and put the glove on them. Qym was so rough on them, I thought about dubbing him KY because the only way the player he was guarding was getting by him was with some lube.
For Glenn, I give him a weekly knob slobbing in the write ups as his hustle and D are usually the catalyst for the Nasty victories. Besides Mike Trev from CC, Glenn is the only player that hits the deck on a weekly basis for a loose ball. With his free throw camp almost bankrupt, this award should serve as some consolation Glenn.
Rookie of the Year, the RoY Award, named after Tommy Kahana, Brendan McCabe, The Big DRunners Up, Tristan , Ben Frutkin
B MiC shouldered most of the load this season for the Big D, with Quincy being an after 8pm Vampire of some sort. Brendan has a game that can kill you in a number of different ways. I still predict the Big D makes it to the finals if Q shows up and that’s because no one can stick Brendan one on one. Welcome to the Dirty Dirty Brendan, if you got money come back next season. If not, the YMCA’s smell funny, but are useful
5th Man of the Year – Matt Monroe, Wheels of Steel
In the few games that Matt showed up and came off the bench, my man was like a 5 Hour Energy Drink. The reason why the Wheels are atop the Dirty Dirty are their depth and a lot of that credit should go to Matt (and Rory, but he gets enough ink as is)
All CAC First Team
Tristan (gets named first), Henricksen, Haas, McCabe, Bobby V
All CAC Second Team
Frutkin, Hammer, Aaron Dush, Qym and Raf Rod
All CAC Third Team
TRUP, Mike Trev, Nick The Beard, Gelow
All Tical Team –
Give me Mike Trev, Scott Searles, Dan Warren, Rory and Mike Suntken of my team any day of the week and I will have agood run…you guys bring it each week and provide me with ALOT of material for the write ups so thank you kind sirs.
All CAC Defensive Team
Qym, Glenn, Dobos, Scott S from AP, Ross
Be sure to pick up your Tical Jump Shot Thermometers on your way out and we apologize if they make you run funny.