Top 200 All Time Co-Ed Scorers (TOP 10!!!)

Originally Posted
2012-04-23

It’s finally time to unveil the top 10.  These 10 players have scored a total of 9,291 points in 601 career games (15.5 per game).  Six of them have won a CAC Co-Ed Championship.  They are the best of the best, combining longevity and consistency with performance.  They are the most competitive and fiery players in between the lines and they are by and large the friendliest and best people in the league to get a beer with.  So here it is…the top 10 scorers in co-ed history.  Enjoy!!

 10 – Chris Boll (Rim Jobbers – 41 gms) – 694 points – One of the original dangerous co-ed slashers, I remember the first time playing Chris Boll, thinking there is absolutely no way to stop this kid.  He was a quick as they come, a nice dude and a good ref to boot.  I’d love to see him go one on one with Jesse in a game to 15.  Two lightning quick slashers with similar size and pretty mediocre outside games (no offense fellas).  That would be a pretty epic battle.

9 – Tibbs (J-Shore Franchise – 49 gms) – 701 points  The Commish!  Tibbs takes plenty of abuse, but I don’t know how many people could do what he does as well as he does it…of course I’m talking about the way he runs the league…his game is garbage…says #13 on the list.  All jokes aside, the CAC has grown exponentially since they started about eight years ago…just look at the banners in Wall Ball Arena!  Tibbs has facilitated that growth while juggling schedules for over a hundred teams and probably about a thousand players.  He’s maintained the websites, assembled staffers to help enhance the experience, and he still finds time to play some ball and take the ball to the hole left and left…and left again…and left again.  Did I mention that Tibbs takes a lot of abuse?  The Big Ginger has actually been one of the co-ed league’s better players for two years since coming into the league while his teams have won probably about 85% of their regular season games.  Tibbs, there will always be critics and it’s impossible to please everybody, but thanks for everything because no matter what anybody says…you do a great job #duyonlies

8 – Matt Forthrizzi (JLAI, DL Plaid, TWSS – 37 gms) – 714 points – Matt Forthrizzi (along with Kelsey Simonds) turned the Baran/Nibs/NateDogg/Austin/Alleigh/Driscoll franchise from a middle of the road to pretty good team into a championship squad in the spring of 2011.  The addition of Forthrizzi made all the difference in the world when this team ruled the Arg after starting the season 0-3, eventually running the table including a Unification win (that I considered an upset and I was the biggest JLAI believer) over the Wheels Of Steel.  Forthrizzi was the catalyst…some of you might wonder what it’s like to walk in the man’s shoes…well, I’ll tell you…it’s PAINFUL.  Last fall, a bunch of us went to his place for a party and I showed up ready for some good company, good times and good drinks.  Figuring it was a house event and having nobody to impress with my beautiful girlfriend in Connecticut, I showed up in a t-shirt and sneakers.  Apparently the plan was to eventually make our way to hell…I’m sorry, by hell I mean Ned Divines…long line, $10 beers, way too crowded and  a crappy cover band…I’ll never know why that bar is so popular, but I digress.  Since I didn’t meet the dress code, I had to borrow some of Forthrizzi’s clothes and good Lord, my feet have never hurt so much at the end of a night.  I guess that’s what it’s like for girls?  I dunno.  Bottom line…the kid can play.  He shoots, he slashes and he’s a great dude.  I’m glad he’s stuck around in the co-ed ranks

7 – Pat Brown a/k/a Lincoln Hawk (DL Franchise – 50 gms) – 739 points –  It feels like forever since Pat played ball in the CAC ranks, but he still was around long enough to amass an impressive 739 points.  Back when the Llamas were a real laughing stock…before they had Nibs, before they had Roberts, before they had Wolff and before they had Mark and Mike Claffey (sorry Dave), Brown was the cornerstone that they built their teams around.  He had little to no help at first, but he busted his ass and made his teams respectable.  Eventually with a little bit of recruiting, they were actually one of the better teams in the league.  It’s a shame he wasn’t around for the DL White triumph last session, but apparently fatherhood was more important…some people just don’t know how to prioritize

6 – Loren “The Mad Bomber” Turner (Wheels, J-Shore Franchise, Rim Jobbers – 83 gms) – 799 points – From the original Llama Don to The Llama Puncher!!  Loren is one of my favorite players in the league.  You could use a lot of words to describe her, (if the one you have in mind starts with a “c”, you might want to think again just to be safe) but spunky might be the best one of all.  I remember the first time playing against Shirt Before The Shirt.  Before I personally knew anybody from Tibbs’ team I went up for a rebound and when I came down with it, Loren was trying to pry it from my hands from one side of me and one of her female teammates…maybe LJ was doing the same from the other side.  I don’t remember how it happened, but a jump ball was called and I ended up on my back.  The other girl (I think LJ) just walked away, but Loren, who I’d never spoken to in my life at the time, looked down at me, scowled and then stepped over me to walk away.  Nothing before and nothing since has ever simultaneously terrified me and turned me on like that did.  Anyway, Loren is probably most famous from dropping a ton of threes and Brittany Grinering Mark Claffey for saying the magic word, but she’s one of my favorite players in the league just for being a competitor, but knowing when to have fun and laugh at self/others.  If we started a co-ed Hall of Fame…she’d be on the first ballot

Ok, so the top five will come out on Wednesday morning!  No, I’m kidding, we’re doing this thing now.  I’m very lucky to be able to call each of the five guys remaining a very close friend of mine.  I’ve been equally lucky to call each one of them a teammate somewhere along the road.  As long as my girlfriend doesn’t come to her senses and realize what an enormous mistake she’s making, being with a guy who spends this much time on a Top 200 CAC Co-ed Scoring list, I could see all of these guys being at my wedding some day.  They really mean the world to me, and clearly by the fact that they’ve made the top five they’re damn good ballplayers too…

5 – Dave Celli (Blouses, WOMS, NAS, Rim Job Franchise – 85 gms) – 865 points – I’ve lived with three guys in the top five and Celli is one of them.  With the self proclaimed meatiest hamstrings East of the Mississippi this kid loves to run, run, run, run , run on the basketball court.  He is a terror on defense and I’ve made it to three different championship games playing with him.  The first two didn’t go so well as you can see by this picture taken during our second defeat, but we eventually broke through with our run n gun style on the WOMS.  People just don’t get any more laid back or fun than Dave Celli.  He’s a barrel of laughs and his many sayings and catch phrases have worked their way into my every day vocabulary for the last two years.  He’ll never average 20 points a game, but he’s never afraid to do the dirty work.  He hustles, he defends, he passes and he is always in it to win it.  No matter the sport, he’s the ultimate teammate.  He may play basketball like a soccer player, according to his girlfriend, but screw it…it works!

4 – Matt “The Minotaur” Roberts (Wheels, DL White, Seawards, Gangbang – 75 gms) – 1,002 points – Thank you Nick Altschuller for coming up with one of the very best nicknames in CAC Co-ed History.  The Minotaur and Jane Stockton stand alone as the two best nicknames in the league, hands down.  I’m not the best basketball player in the world, but I’m no dummy either.  Rather than get barreled over repeatedly by The Minotaur, I teamed up with him this session on not one…not two…but three different teams (including the B2 league)!!  It’s a lot more enjoyable playing with him than it is playing against him, and even more enjoyable than that is just having a beer and a conversation with the guy!  He looks like the type of guy you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley, but Matt Roberts is one of the nicest people I’ve ever met.  On the court he’s a beast with a surprisingly soft touch and a jump shot that seems to get better with age!  He is also the second all time leading rebounder in league history (1st if you include tournament and unification games) and I could go on for pages about how much I love this kid (he has used the term hetero lifemates).  If all goes well, he and I (and Jane Stockton) will be the first ever players to celebrate our SECOND co-ed championship this week!  Knock on wood…two unbeaten foes stand in our way!

3 – Tristan “The Pegasus” Mouligne (Wheels, Meat Tornado – 46 gms) – 1,026 points – There are plenty of ball players out there that have skills like Tristan.  Lots of guys who can shoot, defend and attack the rim…but few can combine those abilities, with the killer instinct that he also possesses.  Tristan Mouligne is a freakin assassin.  He’s also one of the few players, who focuses, bears down and plays BETTER when he’s angry.  Never out of sorts, he’s one of the most intense competitors there is.  Unfortunately, ankle issues have bogged him down recently, but he’s still one of the very best in the league.  Before his initial ankle injury last session, which I’m amazed at how quickly he came back from, he was playing the best basketball I had ever seen out of him.  He had a three game stretch in our mens league where he was 18 /24 from three point range.  Add his ability to get to the rim and he was simply unstoppable.  After being the bridesmaid so many times in B2, he finally won a much deserved MVP award this season.  On the court, he plays with a chip on his shoulder, but he’s one of my favorite guys to have a beer with after the game.  He’s one of the best players in the league, but if you never saw him inside the gym, you wouldn’t know it from his attitude.  Quick to assume blame even when it isn’t his fault, he is the ultimate teammate.  He’ll bounce back from his latest ankle issue and dominate the spring session.

2 – Mike “Reddick” (Blouses, DL Black, Child Please, Monstars – 59 gms) – 1,275 points – I met Reddick a little less than three years ago, very shortly after moving to Somerville while I played against him in a softball league.  We played the eventual league champion Dirt Dawgs in the first game of the season, and in the first inning of that first game, Mike hit an opposite field home run onto the tennis courts in right field and they went onto mercy rule us.  Celli and Rappoli were on that team as well.  From that point, that whole crew became teammates and close friends of mine.  Mike is one of the most competitive people I’ve ever met in my life.  We’ve teamed up and battled head to head in countless competitions.  We’ve proven ourselves to be a virtually unbeatable cornhole duo, but we’ve gone head to head in basketball, softball, fantasy football, fantasy baseball, beer pong and everything in between.  If there’s something to compete in, he and I will do it.  Not only does Mike compete, but more often than not, he wins.  From a basketball standpoint, he is a strong post player than has range to hit shots from 25 feet and in.  I think one of the characteristics that has always drawn me to Reddick is the fact that he is, and I say this in the most affectionate way possible, a cocky douchebag.  Not sure why that’s a good thing, but I guess it’s also why the Monstars are my favorite team in the league.  I love ball busters, because I am one.  Not only that, but I’d like to think that our propensity for smearing our accomplishments in one another’s faces help him and I to elevate our games.  I know we’re not good enough to compare our friendly rivalry to Bird and Magic, but strictly from a standpoint of two guys who love to battle and push each other to outdo the other, while respecting and liking the hell out of one another…it kinda fits.  As I said, Reddick wins a lot more than he loses, though to date, the CAC championship has eluded him.  I have a feeling that won’t be the case for long.

1 – Paul Nimblett a/k/a Nibs The Baller (Blouses, DL Franchise, JLAI, TWSS, HYKHYW, MEAT  – 76 gms) – 1,476 points – He raps, he sings, he dances, he accessorizes and boy does he shoot!  My somewhat distantly related cousin (no, really) Nibs The Baller (surprise, surprise) is the all time leading scorer in CAC co-ed history.  He’s won a championship, played in another, and captured the hearts of CAC nation…from League Nights Out to karaoke and Sunset, good luck finding a more likable guy.  I actually recently did an interview with Nibs and posted it on the blog, so if you wanna get to know the kid, check it out.  On a personal level, there are few people as emotional, expressive and outgoing as this guy is.  I think often times when people meet somebody like that, it comes across as kind of phony or fake, but that’s the endearing thing with Nibs.  As somebody who has know him for nearly 20 years, I can tell you without an ounce of doubt in my heart that he is as genuine as they come.  That’s just Nibs.  He’s got the biggest heart in the league, and the smallest conscience when it comes to shooting the rock!  He is instant offense.  Anytime Nibs is on your side, you’re not out of it, because he’s the type of guy who can score 9 points in 60 seconds.  Nibs, congrats on being the highest point scorer in league history.  At the rate you’re going, I expect you to hang onto this title for a very long time.  I salute you, my friend.

Well, that concludes our top 200.  If you can’t get enough, I’ll have one last top 200 blog on Thursday after the finals that will have the top 200 scorers INCLUDING unification and tournament games.  That will be strictly a list…I’ll also include the top 100 in rebounds and assists, so be sure to check that out.  I hope you’ve had as much fun reading as I have posting!  Thanks for six fantastic sessions everybody.  I’ll still be around on the boards and hopefully blogging.  Thanks for making this so memorable for me.  I’ll miss you all on the court!

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