Since the normal narrative rankings seem so boring nowadays, I have attached a New Year’s resolution to each team’s seed that might really help improve their chances of winning it all this season. I do realize that you may also have a few resolutions for me, but, well, get your own blog!
#1. A TRIBE CALLED MONKEY
To realize that being adored by so many fans doesn’t win you any CRFC titles.
#2. INDUSTRIAL ECONOMICS
To get Herter, Donlan and Ewan to show up on the same night at least twice this season.
#3. B SQUAD
To finally just pick whether we are going to be a really good team or a team that struggles.
#4. FRED ROBERTS
To understand that it’s one thing to like Fred Roberts, and another thing to play like him.
#5. LADIES FIRST
To really yell at the Wolverine about a call just once, because we all know he definitely deserves it.
To have all of our players show up for the playoffs and give us a legit shot at our first CRFC title.
#7. EVEN MORE COWBELL
To thank Godfrey that Wolverine didn’t put us as the #1 pre-season seed this season.
To go ahead and just submit us all as a full team for the next 10 years.
WILD (Samoan) CARDS – From parts unknown, weights unknown…
To not be distracted by Captain Mike O’Keefe’s startling resemblance to Richard Gere.
DR. KENNETH NOISEWATER
To not get too mad at the Wolverine for his overused testicle references in our write-ups.
To not let Serge eat too many chocolate crullers (also known as Ray Victory sticks) on his Tuesday night dinner breaks with the Wolverine.